Tuesday, August 14, 2012


I have gained some weight.  I have been without my blood pressure pills for a few days, that probably has something to do with it.  I have them now and the weight will probably start coming back off in a few days.  I'm sure it's just water weight.

For the past several months, I have been getting only about 5 1/2 to 6 hours of sleep per night.  It is starting to wear on me.  I have read many times, lack of sleep affects your ability to lose weight.  But, not only that, it seriously affects your health.  I have a prescription for Ambien, but I have heard some horror stories about the things people do while taking it.  My doctor said one of her patients pulled out all of his toenails.  YIKES!!!  I have had the pills a little over a year and I have taken a few, split.  I recently started taking them again, but the half pills are no longer working, I am waking up around 2:30 again.  I am so tired.  I am taking a whole one tonight.  Another problem with this is, I take pain pills for the arthritis in the mornings. About an hour after I take the pain pills (after taking the Ambien the night before) I am so very groggy.  But lack of sleep is also painful.  It just hurts all over when I don't get enough sleep.

Magic Potion
I wonder if any other people feel like they are just trying to find their own, personal magic potion.  I know that it all boils down to calories in vs calories out, but in what combination, how much of each?  Why is it when I eat a lot of bad,  unhealthy food I lose some weight and when I eat a proper amount of good, healthy food I either stagnate or gain (sometimes)?

This weight loss seems to have come to a screeching halt.  I have been moving between 202 and 198 for MONTHS.  I have become very discouraged. It has become very hard.  I thought it was hard before, while everything was new and the weight was coming off.  But it was nothing compared to this.  I wonder if this is what is meant by, "This is where the rubber hits the road"?  Do I just resign myself to the fact that maybe this is as far as I am going to go (and lighten my stress load in the process)?  Is that a cop-out, an excuse to quit because it is too hard? I have not had a period since May.  Could this be part of the reason I am stuck, hormones?  If I do decide to quit, what will happen?  Will it be like people that are trying to concieve, that when they stop trying so hard and relax, it happens?  Probably not, HA! Just wishful thinking.  And by quitting, I don't mean eat and eat and eat (I never did that anyway).  I don't really know what quitting would look like.  What would I do any different?  I don't really know.

1 comment:

  1. Hi Carla! I think you're right in identifying that stress is a big piece of the puzzle here. Our health, whether it's weight or getting enough sleep or making the right choices in life, is really tied to the amount of stress we put ourselves under. Therefore, the key is to manage the stress--everything else will work itself out, you know? :)

    It can be so difficult to know in your head what you need to do to lose weight, but actually DOING it is a whole other kettle of fish. You’re certainly not alone on that front, though. When we do things that sabotage ourselves, it’s usually to fulfill one of our other needs–like when you eat more because you’re stressed out or having a bad day. Understanding these behaviors and changing them within yourself is the real key to weight loss. Take a look at this video in my link. It does a great job explaining our different needs, and how we can repair ourselves to fulfill those needs with healthy habits.